i dont think i can deal with this anymore, just agony and pain. The pain makes me want to walk out the door… I wonder If i died, Would anyone really care, Would i miss my life, Would people notice I’m not there…does he know that I secretly cry and tear myself to shreds every night? does he know that behind my seemingly warm happy eyes lies a broken innocent, ravaged by many sinful hands? does he know that I loathe him for disposing and abandoning me in this forsaken hell? does he know that I bleed for him, that I dwell in this eternal pain for him, that he bind me to this duty? does he know that for every smile I forcefully press against my face a slit is placed upon my delicate skin? does he know that for every word he say it pierces my heart and I grow closer to my death? does he even care that he have started my reckoning? does he realize that even as I lay in the plain plush cushions on my final bed with an expressionless face, I still hold nothing but contempt for him? does he finally understand cursed life he burdened on my fragile shoulders? I don’t think he does, he will never understand…oh…god, what happen with me????? why im going so weak???? am i already dying??
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